Archive for the ‘Hockee Night’ Category

CT from Hockee Night on Chicago Blackhawks free agency

July 1, 2009


Hockee Night is a blog devoted to the Chicago Blackhawks and their weekly podcasts (each Tuesday). Make sure to follow their work and enjoy their very funny Puck Casts. Thanks guys.

Let me preface this by saying I honestly don’t expect to see much out of the Blackhawks in free agency this year. Their biggest concerns are internal, what with guys like Dave Bolland and Kris Versteeg being RFA’s. The biggest issue for the Hawks will be whether or not Martin Havlat will agree to come back on a one year deal. If he does, they’ll pretty much return the same team as last year. If he doesn’t, they’ll have a bit of money to play with, in which case I’d like to see them make a run at Mike Cammalleri or maybe John Madden. The Hawks biggest challenge will be trying to improve on a team that reached the Western Conference Finals while keeping enough cap space to sign Jonathan Toews, Patrick Kane and Duncan Keith to extensions.

This is exactly our luck in Chicago. We finally have ownership in place that would be willing to spend money like the Red Wings used to, and we’re stuck laboring under this goddamned salary cap.

1. Which player, for the love of God, do you NOT want to see in your team’s sweater in the 09-10 season?

Looking at the list, I’m not really afraid of any particular player as much as their potential contract. The Hawks pressing issue will be signing role players to contracts that don’t impact their cap situation in such a way that it costs them guys like Toews, Kane, Keith or Brent Seabrook down the line. While that seems like a no-brainer, keep in mind that GM Dale Tallon has a history of giving role players like Brent Sopel (3 years, $2.3M per) and Dustin Byfuglien (3 years, $3.5M per) oversized extensions. This tendancy, along with Joel Quenneville’s affection for defenseman like Matt Walker who are known for “toughness” and nothing else puts a bit of a scare into me. Walker wasn’t good, but at least he only made $500K last year. My nightmare is that the Hawks for some reason decide to go after a “marquee” physical (read: big stiff) defenseman who just won the Stanley Cup: Hal Gill.

Let me tell you something about Hal Gill: he sucks. He’s terrible. He’s so bad that I incorporated his ineptitude into a drinking game. He’s big and probably strong, but so are the concrete pillars in a parking garage, and they’ve got similar range. Also, even though they aren’t related(that I can tell), Hal’s last name immediately brings to my mind Todd “No Skill” Gill who played the bulk of his career with the Toronto Maple Leafs (back in their Norris days) and also made stops in St. Louis and Detroit (honestly, the only thing that could make me hate Todd Gill more was if he’d done some freelancing for the Nazis) before showing up in Chicago in 2002 where the Hawks mercifully euthanized his career. He was so bad, he could only get into 5 games with the 02-03 Hawks. I mean, look at this roster for cripes sake. LOOK AT IT!

Anyway, I don’t want any part of Hal Gill, and the thought of the Hawks possibly signing him makes me wake up with night sweats.

2. Conversely, pick a potential move by another team that would just crush your soul/favorite team’s chances.

I gotta be honest, this already happened. I was sure the Detroit Red Wings wouldn’t be able to Zetterberg, Datsyuk AND Johan Franzen, but they already did. So I guess my biggest fear is that Marian Hossa, Mikael Samuelsson and Jiri Hudler all sign on with Detroit for a combined salary of $650,000 for 10 years.

I’d also hate to see the Sedin twins stay in the Western Conference. I would highly recommend that those two freaks go play in the Eastern Conference with its easy travel schedule and tolerance of people who are genetic copies of each other. Here in the Western Conference, we still believe that identical twins are the product of the union between a she-wolf and the Olmec god Xt’Tapalatakettle, and we god-fearing Western Conferencites want nothing to do with that.

Unless they want to sign in Chicago at a rock-bottom price. That I’m okay with.

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Five Questions: Chicago vs. Calgary

April 16, 2009

Some really great stuff for the Flames vs. the Blackhawks at the satellite blog.

For the Flames, we enlisted our tenured scholar of Calgary, Kent of Five Hole Fanatics and Matchsticks and Gasoline fame. He provided us with yet another great contribution. Here’s a bite:

“The organization spent a lot of money this season and expectations were elevated by the club’s high budget and relatively good results in the middle of the year. If Calgary once again flames out in the first round, there’s going to be a lot of hard questions asked and I’d guess at least one head is going to roll.”

Once again, the Blackhawks bloggers gave us not one, but TWO great contributions. The first comes from Clare from All Hawks – who, by the way – might just edit our Calgary/Chicago mini-blog. Check out this excerpt:

“The Blackhawks web crew has really out-done themselves this year, and Burish has been a main part in many of the videos on the website. Between the Prankster Parts 1, 2 and 3 and the Ladies Man video it is hard to miss Burish. He can always provide a laugh and his overall likeability is what make him so endearing to Hawks fans.”

Finally, our buddy CT from Hockeenight wrote his responses, too. We had an absolute ball sharing our reflections on the Hawks (but more so on man boobs) with CT and forklift during the Hockee Night podcast if you haven’t heard it yet. Here’s a piece of CT’s post:

“For some reason, Joel Quenneville has got it into his head that journeyman defenseman Matt Walker is a top 4 guy. He’s been playing big minutes this season, often while paired with Brian Campbell, and he’s awful. His only tangible asset is his size, but he’s too slow to catch anybody and hit them. He’s pretty bad covering in his own zone, and even worse, as of late he’s gotten it in his head that he’s Phil Housely, making crazy cross ice passes to no one in particular.”

Just a great trio of posts. Read them all here.

For those fools who’d like to hear my voice

April 7, 2009

Click above for the Puck Cast with the (kick ass) guys at Hockeenight. Hopefully, my posting of that will not stop you from checking out their blog and their past Puck Casts (featuring friend de la blog Earl Sleek among others). If the above embedded file doesn’t work, try downloading/streaming the mp3 version (you can find that in the past Puck Casts link above).

Thankfully, the guys were nice enough to tolerate my egotistical asides about pro wrestling and my green-ness when it came to talking over them and interrupting their superior thoughts. The real highlights are when we talk about Big Van Vader‘s man boobs, a shockingly ill-conceived Chicago Blackhawks promotional night and some other weird stuff.

It’s recommended to listen to the whole thing because it really picked up in the middle and end.

Surprisingly, I didn’t hate my voice that much although I think I have a mild lisp. Feel free to discuss/openly mock me in the comments. Hopefully you’ll find it as entertaining as it was fun to do. Thanks, forklift and CT! Perhaps we’ll do this thing again sometime soon.